Enlisted Eval Writing: Load for Bear

 Here’s how the world works when it comes to writing an eval: you either get the eval you write, or you get the eval you deserve.
Ok, not really, but if you turn garbage in to your Chief, DIVO or DH, then you throw yourself at the mercy of the system to recognize your awesomeness and recommend you for promotion. 
I hate to break it to you, but sometimes your leadership can’t see the Superman through your Clark Kent disguise.  Help them out a little, after all they’re officers and have to be helped along a little.
The other side of this is that the language matters more than you may realize.  Simply cataloging your accomplishments misses the mark.  This is where reporting seniors communicate to the board if you’re a good candidate for anchors or just a good technician.  Silence on key topics speaks volumes. 
You want to make sure you check the leadership box as well as the technical expertise box.  Getting an eval that says you’re a “good technican” is a polite way of saying “sailor meets all basic requirements for being a PO2.” So, you either choose your language for the eval writer or you let them choose it for you.  Now they can still change whatever you send it, but since they’ve got 20+ to write and review a well written submission will have fewer changes than FC2 Dirtbag’s submission on a wadded up Kleenex.  Here’s a few quick and dirty principles to help you up your game.
Write a rough draft
Be concise and use a bullet style
Don’t use flowery language (raises the BS flag)
Let numbers speak instead of words.  Performance talks, extra verbiage walks.
Write clearly so even an Admiral could understand it. (Don’t draw cartoons, you’ll use up too many lines)
Include:
Responsibilites/Customers served
Leadership specifics
Specific accomplishments for command/Navy and personnel supervised
Retention efforts and results
Quals achieved during reporting period
Education completed and diplomas
Personal awards received
Civic activities
*Reservists: Civilian Work and accomplishments
Opening Statement: Have a lead in statement:
My #1 of XX Petty Officers
My #1MP, restricted by EP quota
Meat in the Middle:
Use bullets to show performance: Outstanding Leader:
N8 LPO executed 15 joint exercises flawlessly leading 20 junior personnel. Oversaw the reenlistment of 4 sailors.
AEGIS SME: Corrected 35 system casualties in an average of 4 hours.  Provided tech assist to 2 other DDG’s in AOR with same issue. Awarded NAM for superior trouble shooting performance on deployment.
Closing Statement:
My highest Recommendation for Chief Petty Officer. Select for the most Challenging Assignment.
Also, if you can, have someone who has sat a board review the eval and get their cut.

Remember, no amount of wordsmithing will make a poor performer into a prince, so you’ve got to sustain superior performance throughout the year.